She smiled sadly as she turned on the faucet, filling the bath with hot water. She went to the kitchen to have something to eat. Opening the fridge, she hoped that there might be some leftover chicken from the night before. Seeing none, she closed the door in dismay. She quickly walked to the bathroom to check on the water, but it still had a while before it was filled. Testing it with her hand, she turned up the hot water and closed the bathroom door to let the room fill with steam. She hesitantly picked up the phone, but quickly set it back on the receiver. She saw the picture on her bedside table upon entering her bedroom. For almost a full minute she stood, unmoving, staring at the photo. She could almost see where she had glued the wood back together. For the first time, she noticed that his shirt was inside-out. She laughed. He never quite knew how to dress himself correctly. Boy, she would miss him. She slowly walked across the room, having to step over dirty laundry and school books on the way. She turned the frame face-down, and reached for a small blue candle and a box of matches. It was her favorite candle, with a yellow and gold sun imprinted on one side and a silver moon on the other. She again returned to kitchen to find a light snack. She washed and dried a Red-Delicious apple, but then decided against it. She reached for a much less healthy snack; potato chips. They always had been her favorite. Opening the bag, she slowly revisited the bathroom. The room was filled with a warm mist so thick she could barely see the tub in front of her from the doorway. Setting her candle on the sink, she tested the water, but it still was not warm enough. Turning up the hot water once again, she sat for a moment, watching the water pour into the tub, and following the rising steam until she could no longer see it. She stood slowly and made her way to the living room. The remote to the TV was still missing, so she planted herself directly in front of the set. Finishing off the bag of chips, she watched as a young girl, quite like herself, was held tightly in the arms of her lover. She continued to watched until they let go. Reaching forward, she quickly changed the channel. Good things must always end. On the following channel, the news showed the path of the hurricane, which had already begun to affect her home town. It had been raining all day, and the temperature had dropped significantly since yesterday. On the next channel, a fire raged while a family of four stood outside and watched their home burn to the ground. To everyone’s surprise a small brown dog ran out through the wall of smoke, barking almost happily. The family smiled and ran to meet their beloved canine. Sighing, she stood and turned off the TV, it was time for her bath. Turning off the light, she blindly lit her candle and turned off the running water, inviting a calming silence into the room. Removing her clothes, she stepped into the almost too- hot bath. She sank into the water and closed her eyes. She sat in the silence, until it was interrupted by the shrill ringing of the telephone. It was like a baby’s cry for his mother; lost, alone, and afraid. She did not move to answer it. Hearing his voice on the answering machine, she slid underwater before the tears could come. She stayed submersed until she felt as though her lungs were about to rupture. Reaching over the edge of the bath, she slid her hand into the pocket of her silk bath robe, and felt her fingers wrap around the cold hard metal. Shaking it free of the robe, she let it fall into the bath, watching it sink beneath the soap-filled water. She grasped the handle just before she lost sight of it under the foamy water. Holding it in view, she looked at herself in the reflection of the metal. Her long brown hair, and hazel eyes gave her an almost young and innocent look. Wiping away a tear, she sighed and set the knife down on the floor next to her. Drying off, and dressing herself only in her bathrobe, she brought the knife to the kitchen. Entering her room again, she curled up on her bed, and wrapped herself in her sheets. She laid her head upon her pillow, and let the stream of tears flow. Feeling them stream down her face, she was reminded of the bath water running, a constant flow of water controlled by the turn of a handle. She wished it was that easy. She rolled over and closed her eyes. She awoke late the next morning, with the sun shining brightly into her room. Climbing out of bed, she sighed. Everything would be okay after all.
